I’m actually getting better this week. I’m finally coming to grips with the fact that I may actually do the surgery but need to figure it out soon. I don’t want to lose next spring but I’ll probably wait until after labor day weekend. From posts of others here I know there will be times that I will want to give up completely because it’s difficult. At the same time I feel much more prepared knowing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel despite the difficulty that I will endure—maybe a little better or worse than others, but still a rough period. Then there is enlightenment. That is a good feeling.

I actually registered a few domains (some really good ones I didn’t know I could get!) so that I could blog my story. I’m not sure why I’m doing this, perhaps for myself and some others who will undoubtedly be as miserable as I was/am/maybe/ don’t know. It’s raw thought on the web and if I make it through, then others can related and see where they are at and how someone else has navigated… I’m more upbeat this week but still I’m wavering in and out of depression. But I’m higher on the totem pole…